Howie Monroe and the Enchanted Chew Bone
by 626and624
Summary: A story first mentioned in the 3rd book in the series.  Howie comes out of retirement to write this newest book.  Howie Monroe and Delilah Gorbish return to the Dogwiz Academy for Canine Conjurers for a second week.  Currently on Hiatus
1. The Return Letter

Disclaimer: I do not own BUNNICULA or any of its characters. All I own is the story line. Also, since this is a parody of the Harry Potter series, I believe that I also need to say: I do not own Harry Potter or any of its characters.

* * *

><p><strong>Howie's Writing Journal<strong>

** I got a letter from my old editor the other day requesting a new book for my series "Tales From The House Of Bunnicula". He said that he had received a ton of letters from fans of my series requesting another book. I would, but it's been so long, and I have so much going on, so don't think I should. I was talking to Uncle Harold, (he's not really my uncle, I just call him that), last night about my old book series and if I should write another book. He told me that it has been a few years since I wrote the last book in my series (See Book 6: The ****Amazing**** Odorous Adventures of Stinky Dog by Howie Monroe). I told him that I was busy and didn't have time to write. You see, since my last book, there's been a big change in my life. I started dating my best friend (now my girlfriend) Delilah Gorbish (See Book 6: The ****Amazing**** Odorous Adventures of Stinky Dog by Howie Monroe). He told me that my relationship was really important, but it shouldn't be my whole life. He said that I used to love writing. I told him that I still do, but I also love Delilah. He said that he knows and I should talk to Delilah about this. I think I will.**

**Howie's Writing Journal**

**I told Delilah about the letter on our next date, sitting in an alleyway behind a pizza parlor, eating a pizza we found sitting next to a dumpster. She told me that I should write another book. I asked her why, out of curiosity, and she said that it was my WRITING that made her fall for me in the first place. It was a good thing there wasn't much light because I started blushing. I told her that while I'm writing, I might not be able to go out on some nights. She told me that she understood. Alright then. I'll do it. Although I have NO IDEA of what to write. Maybe Pop (whose real name is Chester, I just call him that) will have an idea.**

**Howie's Writing Journal**

**I spoke to Pop about my new book and he just rolled his eyes. "You're going back to writing those silly little books" he said, "I thought you'd given those up." Not much help there. So I decided to ask Uncle Harold about it. He's written all these books about our rabbit Bunnicula, so he might have an idea for me.**

**Howie's Writing Journal**

** Uncle Harold just gave me the BEST idea. He reminded me that in my third book, "Howie Monroe and the Doghouse of Doom", I mentioned a sequel "Howie Monroe and the Enchanted Chew Bone". Now I know what to write. So, At long last, the long awaited sequel to my hit book****: "Howie Monroe and the Doghouse of Doom". I present "Howie Monroe and the Enchanted Chew Bone".**

**CHAPTER ONE: THE RETURN LETTER**

Howie Monroe, still sharp as a whip, cute as a button, and an orphan, was sitting in his new room at his mean aunt and uncle's house with his new girlfriend Delilah, a very, very, very, very, very, very smart puppy, and his new cat-friend Herbert (who was once evil and used to be known as 'The-Evil-Force-Whose-Nam-C'not-Be-Spoke'). Ever since he returned home from his first week at the Dogwiz Academy for Canine Conjurers, the Monroes were terrified that if they treated the sweet, not to mention adorable, Howie poorly, then they would wake-up in their beds as nothing more than a doggie chew bone. Unknown to them, students at Dogwiz are not allowed to use their conjuring powers outside of the school. This was the only thing keeping them from throwing him out and made to live in the rickety, old, run-down doghouse in the backyard. It took a lot of persuasion, but Howie was able to convince the Monroes to adopt Herbert and let him stay with them.

Delilah was sitting next to Howie, the dashing, not to mention intelligent, dachshund puppy, nibbling on an acorn she picked up on her way over, (See Book 2: **Invasion of the Mind Swappers from Asteroid 6!™). **"Oh Howie" Delilah said in her British accent, (See Book 3: Howie Monroe and the Doghouse of Doom by Howie Monroe) and fluttering her long eyelashes, "You know I love you right?" "I love you too Delilah" Howie said, giving her a kiss. "Not while I'm in the room please" Herbert said, feeling a little disgusted. "Sorry Herbert" Howie said, when his ears, which were as finely tuned as a concert piano, perked up. "What is it Howie" Delilah asked. "The mail just came" Howie said as he ran to the front door to get the mail, stopping for a minute in the hall from his bursitis in his back left leg. "Ooo, my bursitis" he moaned as he was stopped. When he reached the mail, he saw there was a letter addressed for him and one addressed to Delilah. Picking them both up in his mouth, he carried them back to his room.

"What took you so long Howie?" Herbert asked. "My bursitis" Howie said, after dropping the letters from his mouth. "Sorry about that" Herbert said. He was the one who caused it in the first place. Howie remembered the first time he heard the story. After Howie, Delilah, and Howie's best friend Snivel got off the Wiz-On-Wheels, Hamlet, a giant dog at Dogwiz, told him about it. According to Hamlet, back when Howie was just a cute, frisky, and innocent baby puppy, and when Herbert was evil, he sat on Howie's parents, the good and (as Hamlet put it) saint'ly Howard and Heather, destroying them. Howie had run out of the way just in time and was left with bursitis in his back left leg.

"What have you got there Howie?" Delilah asked. "I don't know?" Howie said, sliding Delilah's letter to her, "There's one for both of us." "I wonder what it could be" Delilah said, opening her letter, "It's from Dogwiz." Howie took his letter out of its envelope and read it to himself.

Dear. Howie Monroe

We here at the Dogwiz Academy for Canine Conjurers are pleased to offer you an invitation to attend a second week here at the Dogwiz Academy for Canine Conjurers. If you would like to attend, please return the enclosed application along with $5. Hope to see you again at the Dogwiz Academy for Canine Conjurers.

Yours Sincerely, Ageless Duffelbag, Headmaster

Howie, after reading his letter with his eyes which were as finely tuned as a concert piano, went to read Delilah's letter. It was the exact same as his letter, with the exception that it had her name on it instead of his. "Dufflebag must know you're here Delilah" Howie said over her shoulder. "Indeed" Delilah said. After he finished reading Delilah's letter, he ran off to the scariest place in the entire house…under Pete Monroe's bed, (See Book 1: It Came From Beneath The Bed by Howie Monroe). "Where's he off to?" Delilah asked Herbert. "I don't know," Herbert said, "I can't read minds anymore."

Howie, the fearless, dauntless, and not to mention determined, dachshund puppy had just gotten under Pete's bed. _I found 10 bucks down here the other week_, Howie thought with his keen mind which was as sharp as the taste of a large steak that was dropped on the floor and couldn't be eaten by people, so you get it all for yourself. Howie turned his head to the left and there he saw it. Two crumpled up 5 dollar bills. _Excellent_ Howie thought as he grabbed the money and backed out from under the bed. He and Delilah were going BACK to the Dogwiz Academy for Canine Conjurers. However, Howie couldn't help but feel that things he couldn't imagine would happen. Again.

**Howie's Writing Journal**

** I showed Uncle Harold my first chapter and he was very impressed. He said that it was like I never stopped writing. He also said that he feels I was referencing my past books too much. I told him that since it's been a few years since my last book, it might be a good idea to remind my readers. He had no response to that. Then he said that he feels that I am using too many adjectives to describe a certain character again. I think Uncle Harold still has a hang-up on adjectives. Just like old times.**

**Howie's Writing Journal**

** I just showed Delilah my first chapter. She also said that it's like I never stopped writing. However, I'm making her character just as I did in my earlier books, as if I never learned how to write female characters. I thought she'd at least like that I included our relationship.**

* * *

><p><strong>SO THAT WAS CHAPTER 1. PLEASE REVIEW. CHAPTER 2 WILL BE UP NEXT SATURDAYSUNDAY.**


	2. Return to Dogwiz

Disclaimer: I do not own BUNNICULA or any of its characters. All I own is the story line. Also, since this is a parody of the Harry Potter series, I believe that I also need to say: I do not own Harry Potter or any of its characters or ideas.

**CHAPTER TWO: RETURN TO DOGWIZ**

A few days later, Delilah, and the ever anxious Howie, were standing at the abandoned gas station on the wrong side of the tracks once again, waiting for the Wiz-on-Wheels. Herbert had decided to stay at home. When the curious Howie asked him, he simply replied "I don't know how people would react to me, since I was once evil." "Alright then" the understanding Howie said, "But what if I need to talk to you?" "You'll find a way" was all Herbert said before turning around to take a nap. As Delilah and Howie were waiting, Delilah decided to start a conversation. "Oh Howie," she said, fluttering her long eyelashes, "You've been ever so quiet. Is there something wrong?" "Yes there is" the brave, yet uncertain, Howie said, "There is something I never told you about our last week at Dogwiz." "Is there another girl?" Delilah asked. "No, nothing like that" the forever-loyal Howie said as he explained, "Soon after I went in the doghouse of doom, a letter was slid under my bedroom door. The letters were all cut out of _Preteen Conjurer_ magazine. It said 'Just you wait, Monroe! You're not safe yet!'." "What could that mean?" Delilah asked. "I'm not sure" Howie said. Delilah was about to say something, when the Wiz-on-Wheels showed up. The door opened and the two puppies said "Ippity-up." Just like last week, Howie and Delilah were floating through the air into the van. A disembodied voice said "All aboard for Dogwiz", the door closed and the van drove off.

"Howie" a familiar voice called from the side of the van. "Snivel!" Howie and Delilah said, running over to their best friend. "Hey guys" Snivel said, "How are you?" "Great" Howie and Delilah said together. "What's new" Snivel asked. "Not much" the still-friendly Howie replied, "Herbert is living with me, and Delilah is my girlfriend now." "Really" Snivel asked, before being interrupted. "Well, bursitis-boy" an all-too familiar terrier, "someone actually lowered their pride and decided to _date_ you." "Baco!" the normally-level headed Howie said, with a hint of a growl in his voice, and his bursitis flaring. He _hated_ Baco. Ever since his first day at Dogwiz, Bacon Malcontent and his goons, Grab and Run, always gave him a hard time. "What's it to you Baco?" Delilah asked, a growl also in her voice. Baco was about to make a snappy come-back, when all of a sudden, the Wiz-on-Wheels stopped and the door opened again. "All off fer th' Dogwiz Academy o' Canine Conj'rers!" a low and familiar voice said. "Hi Hamlet" Howie, Delilah, and Snivel said, getting off the van. "How 're y'a t'ree" Hamlet asked, using just as many apostrophes as last week. "Good" the Howie said. "What's new?" Hamlet asked. "Howie and I started dating" Delilah told him. "Ain't tha' a nice surpr'se" Hamlet said. "Yeah. And Herbert is living with me" Howie said, giving Hamlet another surprise. "Yeh mean The-Evil-Force-Whose-Nam-C'not-Be-Spoke is livin' with yeh?" Hamlet asked, "Ev'n though 'e destroyed yer parents?" "Yep" Howie said. "Well, yeh must be more fer'givin then I be" Hamlet said. "Probably" Snivel said. "Well, yeh must be gettin' to the chamber o' chow. Professor Dufflebag will be startin' the feast any minute now." "Alright," Delilah said, "Thanks Hamlet." Delilah pulled the starving Howie towards the chamber of chow as fast as she could, as she too was very hungry.

**Howie's Writing Journal**

** I let Uncle Harold read what I wrote so far, and he said that he feels I am mentioning my relationship with Delilah too much. I told him that I wanted to let Howie's friends know about it. Once again, Uncle Harold had no response. He also said that he feels I was using too many adjectives again, especially about one character in particular (poor Uncle Harold).**

"To our new student's welcome" Ageless Dufflebag said from the front of the chamber of chow, "To our old students, welcome back." "But we're not old, we're puppies" the funny and clever Howie joked. "Oh Howie" Delilah giggled and batting her eyelashes, "That was very funny." "Shhh. Snivel said, pointing to Dufflebag. "In the past week, thanks to the effort of Howie Monroe, The-Evil-Force-Whose-Nam-C'not-Be-Spoke is no longer evil. Also, there is a new threat. This new threat is known to the conjuring world as The-Dark-Force-Whose-Nam-Is-Forbidden-To-Say." Everyone in the chamber gasped at the news of a new evil threat. "He must be the one who slid the letter into your room last week Howie" Delilah said. "What letter?" Snivel asked. "I'll tell you later" the keen-eyed Howie said, as he noticed Baco, Grab, and Run looking in his direction, with their ears perked up. "Also," Dufflebag continued, "we have a new teacher joining us this week. I am pleased to introduce, Professor Mc. Donagul. She will be teaching the new class of transforming-everyday-objects-into-new-objects." "A new class" Delilah said excitedly, "I can't wait." Howie knew she would be excited about a new class because she was very, very, very, very, very, very smart.

Later that night, Howie, the tired puppy, had just finished telling Snivel about the letter he received at the end of his last book (see book 3: Howie Monroe and the Doghouse of Doom by Howie Monroe). "Who sent you that note?" Snivel asked as he and Howie got into bed. "No idea" Howie said, "but I think it was The-Dark-Force-Whose-Nam-Is-Forbidden-To-Say." All of a sudden, a note was slid under the door of Howie's and Snivel's room. Howie, the curious puppy, got out of bed and went over to the note. "What is it?" Snivel asked. "Another note" Howie said. He opened the note and noticed it was made with letters from issues of _Preteen Conjurers_ like the last one. Howie took a look at the note and read it out loud.

LOOK OUT MONROE. YOU MAY HAVE STOPPED THE-EVIL-FORCE-WHOSE-NAM-C'NOT-BE-SPOKE, BUT YOU'LL NEVER STOP THE-DARK-FORCE-WHOSE-NAM-IS-FORBIDDEN-TO-SAY.

"Wow" Snivel said, after Howie showed him the note, "it must have taken him a long time to cut out all the letters like that. "Yeah" Howie said. He tucked the note under his pillow, after making a mental note to show it to Delilah in the morning, and went to sleep

**Howie's Writing Journal**

** I let Delilah read what I have written so far. She agreed with Uncle Harold that I am using too many adjectives again, (what is it with people and adjectives). But she didn't mind about me mentioning our relationship as much as Uncle Harold. I blushed as she said this.**

The next morning, Snivel and the nervous, yet brave, Howie showed Delilah the note Howie received the previous night. "This is getting serious Howie" Delilah said after reading the note. "It is?" Howie asked. "Yes." Delilah said, "I think Herbert needs to hear about this." "But how am I supposed to tell him?" Howie, the confused puppy, asked. "I can tell him for you sir" yet another familiar voice said. "Hoppy!" Howie said. Hoppy the talking frog from Howie's last week at Dogwiz, hopped up to the dachshund puppy. "Yes sir, it is Hoppy sir" Hoppy said. "Hoppy, can you tell Herbert about The-Dark-Force-Whose-Nam-Is-Forbidden-To-Say, and that I received another note last night?" Howie asked. "Certainly sir" Hoppy said, "Hoppy can do that sir." "Thanks Hoppy" Howie said. "Come on Howie" Delilah said, pulling him once again, "It's time for our new class."

"My name is Professor Mc. Donagul" the new professor said, "and in this class, you will learn how to turn everyday objects into new objects." "I can tell this is going to be a very interesting class." Delilah said. "Now," Mc. Donagul said, pulling out a box from under her desk and pulled out a small object, "for our first lesson, we will be starting simple. We will be starting by creating squeaky toys from dust bunnies." "EEEEEEK" Delilah shrieked, as she ran out of the room, "Dust bunnies!" (see book 1: It Came From Beneath The Bed by Howie Monroe). "What was that about?" Mc. Donagul asked over Baco and his goon's snickering. "It's nothing" Howie said as he walked out of the room after Delilah, "I'll calm her down."

After Howie had found Delilah and calmed her down, Snivel came running up to them. "Guys, what's going on, class is over" Snivel said. "It's nothing" Howie said, with Delilah's head resting in his shoulder. "Well, let's go," Snivel said, "Professor Sneak's class will be starting in a few minutes." "Then let's go" Delilah said, snapping her head up at the thought of being late for a class.

**Howie's Writing Journal**

** I have writer's block again. What should I have them do in Sneak's class? I think I should ask Uncle Harold again. I remember asking him about this once before (****See Book 2: ****Invasion of the Mind Swappers from Asteroid 6!™), but I forgot what he told me.**

**Howie's Writing Journal**

** I asked Uncle Harold and he gave me two ideas. The first was to take a nap. The second was to take a break from writing. I think I'll take a nap first. And if that doesn't work, I'll take a break.**

**Howie's Writing Journal**

** I took a nap, but that didn't work. I have a date with Delilah tonight. Maybe she can help.**

**SO THAT WAS CHAPTER 2. PLEASE REVIEW. CHAPTER 3 WILL BE UP NEXT SATURDAY/SUNDAY.**


End file.
